Trudge

Trudge

I pulled into the parking lot. It was dark. I had never been up this early by choice. I sighed and turned off the car. Making sure I had everything with me that I needed, I got out of the car. The smell of construction, fast food grease, and humidity filled the air. My stomach did not even respond; it was most likely still sleeping. I walked up to the building and opened the door. A blast of freezing cold air hit me. Here we go. I pulled out my gym card and scanned it as the worker never even bothered to look up from his phone. I cannot say that I blame him; NO ONE is ever crazy enough to want to get out of bed to go work out at this crazy hour. He was probably the overnight worker, ready to go home to bed.

As I plug into my worship music and open my Bible app, I begin slowly walking—or more of what I like to call, trudging. (To trudge: the slow, weary, depressing yet determined walk of a man who has nothing left in life except the impulse to simply soldier on- according to Chaucer from the movie A Knight’s Tale) While yes it is a bit dramatic, it is how my body feels as I try to wake it up. Again I let out a groan, but not too loud because apparently there are about twenty others who actually WANT to be here. I get into a good rhythm and begin to feel the sleep leave my body.

My Bible reading is in John. I have come to the part of the Samaritan woman and her discussion with Jesus. I find myself very annoyed because suddenly I feel as though Jesus is quite arrogant with her. I mean, who tells someone, “You worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know because Salvation is from the Jews” (heard in my mind as a condescending voice). I could not read and further. I know the story but suddenly felt really annoyed to the point of even being a bit insulted. I began to picture Christ with his nose up in the air, looking down at this woman. I feel my fists forming into balls, and my thoughts start racing.

I look away from what I was reading, struggling to make sense of it. Then it happened. My thoughts immediately quieted and I focused on the twenty-two TV screens in front of me. They are showing sports, news, advertising cleaning machines, cooking shows, health shows, TV shows, and movies. I begin to zone in on the ones playing sports as they begin to show a player who was injured. From two angles you cannot tell what happens; then they show the other angle and you see the player’s ankle nearly break. They then proceed to show the first two angles again and it was with amazement that you can see what was missed before. It was with an eerie settling in my heart that I was slowly beginning to understand.

Often times we are quick to react; quick to not understand; quick to get insulted; quick to assume. But how often are we quick to investigate; quick to listen; quick to be silent? Notice, the Samaritan woman did not leave in a huff, complaining about being offended. Context, or angle, is super important. Slowing down and just listening, watching, waiting; things we don’t do often enough and miss out. This part of our home assignment has not been easy. We have not seen things happen the way we wanted, but does that mean nothing is happening? It means our view is limited, and in God’s timing he will show us the other angles. So we can either keep trudging along, or we can enjoy every chance we have to be quick to listen; quick to be slow; quick to watch; and continue to press on—keeping our eyes on HIM.

5 Comments
  • Bunny
    Posted at 20:02h, 24 November Reply

    Our hearts are with you. It is not easy for us like you said. But this is God’s work. His ways are not ours nor His thoughts ours. But we are His children, the love of Him. He wants us to just bask in His love and relationship with Him! We are praying. Love you 😍

  • Stu Kopelman
    Posted at 21:30h, 24 November Reply

    Yeah. Great story Greg. Here’s another. A man bragging about how much Scripture he knows. Why…he had 60 years of it. He is all about the Law and how obedient we must be to it. People reading his comments are agitated. He shows no love, had no friends, and when others seemed sickened by his self idolization, he doubles down on his proud thoughts even more. And what did I do? Told him how unrelatable he was, that no one was listening to him. So to defend himself, he gave me the verse about the log in my own eye. So I got angry because he seemed blind to it all. Here was a case where two people—two Christians could not listen, where two Christians were unforgiving in their march toward being right.

    When the rich man walked away from the Lord, Jesus told his disciples that he loved him. He never even looked his way, never spoke to him, never called him back or chased after him; he let him go. Boy, hindsight is always 20/20. 🙂

  • Martha Muhindo
    Posted at 03:22h, 25 November Reply

    Thanks for this perspective. I wasn’t sure where you were going and my heart was hammering but you lead me with you, to a place of new insight and understanding. Wow, I wish that my workouts produced such deep thoughts. We are praying with you for the Lord’s timing and provision of all that you need to return. We miss you!!!

  • Beth Haws
    Posted at 09:21h, 25 November Reply

    Spot on for me ! Thank you so much.

  • Anita Kelly
    Posted at 17:17h, 25 November Reply

    God’s timing I’d always perfect. We just lack the ability to see it. When we learn to live in the moment, ever trusting Him,, it helps to make all things a joy.
    Happy Thanksgiving. I’m sure it’s a blessing to your family to have you here.

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